Small Town Churches

I live in a small town at the bottom of Ohio.
Naturally , my community was part of the famous Bible belt that stretched across America. I heard the name of God early and most everyone in town went to church. We were all raised with a sense of morals and respect. We were taught to regard our elders and pray before we eat. I envisioned that one day my children would be a part of a church in our hometown.

In my twenties, my husband and I tried several churches in the area and came up with the same results. The environments we encountered were not welcoming like we had hoped. Instead, we were treated like outsiders and made to feel as if everyone was holier than thou. We searched and searched for a church home all the while praying to God for guidance as to where he wanted us to be. Each time we were met with an over righteous congregation that would likely turn Jesus himself away if he was to come knocking.

Now, before you stop reading, I am not trying to bash a specific denomination or preacher. I am not saying all churches are bad or Christians are condemning in nature. I am talking to the families that have had the same experiences of feeling not welcome in small town churches. There is hope, don’t give up. You don’t have to force yourself to sit through sermons while ignoring side glances from your neighbor.
You don’t have to choke down the feelings of inadequacy imposed by others just to hear the Word.

In my opinion a prostitute should be able to walk into a Sunday morning service without any snarky looks. A biker, covered in tattoos, should have a seat without scoffs in his direction. An addict should be able to walk through those doors without disgust reaching others’ faces. What better place for the lost to be then in his Father’s house and amongst uplifting people. But that is not how it is in small town churches, is it? The moment an atypical person is seen they receive furrowed eyebrows and down slanting of eyes.

What people seem to forget or lack the capacity to understand is how hard it has to be for that person just to show up that day. Maybe they prayed for strength to withstand the scrutiny knowing the difficulties that lie ahead. Maybe they said they were going to attend service and this is the first time in 50 attempts that they got out of their vehicle and walked in. Maybe this is their last stop before self destruction.

What happens most of the time is that person feels alienated and never goes back. Why go somewhere where they are going to feel broken and lacking. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying anyone should condone the behavior of prostitution or drug use. All I am saying is finding a church home can be very difficult and discouraging and the encounters along the way can exacerbate it.

I am now 30 with three kids ages 11,6 and 4 months. After a total of ten years of trying and attending more than 10 churches  reality hit hard. And I don’t mean we went to a handful of Sunday services and then wrote each one off for this reason or that. We walked into each one hoping and praying it would be our church home. After months of attending services regularly, God would always move us somewhere else.

Finally, I came to the conclusion that God had different plans for me. He didn’t want me sitting on a pew every weekend, likely falling into a lukewarm Christian mindset. He wanted me to deep dive into His word and gain a deeper understanding that most people lack. I started gathering my family together every weekend and together we studied the Bible. I cannot express the amount of change that has taken place in my life since that moment.

I begin by doing a Sunday school lesson with the children, followed by listening to a sermon from The Shepherd Chapel with my husband. Not only has our knowledge and understanding grown to astounding levels but so has our love and dedication to our Lord and Savior. It’s one thing to sit in church and listen to a sermon. It is a whole other experience to coordinate a Bible study and be  hands on with each lesson. It anchors you into reality as the teachings become etched into memory as a family event. The best thing I could have ever done is start having ‘church’ at home.

For anyone struggling like I was, just remember Matthew 18:20, “When two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them.” Don’t let the negativity of others stop you from indulging in the letter God has written for  you. Don’t let the devil provide you with an excuse not to take your salvation into your own hands. God meets you where you are and lifts you higher than your mind can conceive, you just have to let Him in. You don’t wait until you’re better to get to know God. You get to know God and he makes you better.